Still alive !!!

Deborah Smith reports;

The bones of seven members of Homo floresiensis found in the cave are so young they have not yet turned to stone, making it much more likely genetic material could be extracted.

OMG OMG OMG. Bones young enough to contain DNA. Bones that have not fossilised !!! The implications !!!

"Could they have persisted somewhere else on the island? Yes, they could have done," said Professor Roberts.

"There are lots of local folk tales in Flores about these people, which are consistent and incredibly detailed.

"The stories suggest there may be more than a grain of truth to the idea that they were still living on Flores up until the Dutch arrived in the 1500s.

"The stories suggest villagers would leave gourds with food for them to eat, but legend has it these were the guests from hell - they'd eat everything, including the gourds."

Cute

"I wouldn't be surprised if modern humans consumed them," said associate Professor Morwood.

"I look forward to finding grisly archaeological evidence of that."

Not cute.

Little Hairy Men Update !!! Hairless !!!

The so-called hobbits, hair-less, dark-skinned dwarfs with small heads and knee-length arms, grew to about the height of a modern three-year-old child. The Age.

Little Hairy Men Update !!! Hairs !!!

The discovery of hair in the Indonesian cave in which a new species of hobbit-sized humans was found has raised Australian scientists' hopes of obtaining their DNA.

OMG. Not even bloggers could pull of a stunt like this.

Little Hairy Men Update !!! Still Alive !!!

Little hairy men and women may have escaped a volcanic eruption 12,000 years ago and survived...

Roberts and his colleagues have not ruled out the possibility the metre-high hobbits were still running around Flores 500 years ago, or even more recently.

Professor Jeffrey Schwartz, of the University of Pittsburgh, has said the hobbit should not have been classified as a human. But Wood has countered that this is like saying the primitive pygmy elephants are not elephants.

Should not be dismissed as fantasy...

People on Flores have told the Australian team tales of a hairy little people they call ebu gogo, about a metre tall, with pot bellies, long arms and ears that stuck out, who lived in caves on the island until the 19th century. "The possibility of finding ebu gogo alive should not be dismissed as fantasy, because mammals unknown to science do still turn up - and South-East Asia is a particular hotspot for such finds," says Gee.

Could still be alive !!!

Holding Himself

Extremely suspect circumstances. First The Commissar is held captive (by himself) and brainwashed into spouting Republican propaganda. Then a bunch of typepad wielding Republicans rescue him. If I didn't know better I would say the whole thing was staged. And that video, the one released on his website (a site not normally known to feature hostage videos) looks fake. He looks too darn smug. I bet Dan's behind it. Or Cheney. Or Laura Bush.

Concerned non-partisan analysts are speculating he has been released only to vote and faces re-abduction for further 24 hour googlebox indoctrination. Damn, they should have held him longer. He's probably voted Bush by now and nothing I can do will prevent his decline into banal fete fundraisers.

Security?

Thailand Prime Minister Thaksin Shinawatra defends Thai security force "gentle measures".

They stacked them like logs, 1311 men and boys in six army trucks. Face down, hands tied behind their backs, one on top of another for the drive to the Thai army base in Pattani.

When the trucks arrived more than six hours later, 78 of the protesters were dead of suffocation or convulsions. At least two had broken necks.

Forensic pathologists say many of the men suffocated in their own village of Tak Bai, Narathiwat province, on Monday, stacked in the trucks for six stifling hours before they were driven to Pattani, 100 kilometres north.

Villagers bury 78, digging mass grave for 28 "unclaimed" bodies.

Floresiensis - Just The Facts

Anyway, some "just facts" because frankly things are getting a little out of hand. Look, I know live blogging has it's quirks and the downside to being first with the news is the tabloid factual void but some people will post anything. F'rinstance these guys are headlining "Hobbit" remains found in Australia. I don't think you'll be finding too many Indonesians thrilled with that. You know, itsabit like calling Iraq America if you get what I mean.

Wired News seem to have discovered a sub-species. Everyone else (all sixteen) are reporting Homo "Floresiensis". Wired News have Homo "Florensiensis". Erm, okay, well, that must be the same sub-typ-er-group I were focusing on.

The Politburo while progressively embracing science perhaps have some memory hole business to tend to. Tiny, yes. Ancient? Perhaps not. The Syd Morning Herald are reporting that these tiny and perfectly proportioned humans might have died out only 500 years ago.

Oh yes, that cute little picture of Floresiensis man with giant speared rat drapped over shoulder is a bit at odds with first found bones, which belonged to a 30 year old woman. Maybe little naked man more appealing to artist?

Speed

Amazing. This morning searching little people story 7am-ish (Aus eastern standard time) there were only two google results. By the end of my morning dash (running 'round swallowing coffee and throwing on clothes and reading headlines and creating own headlines) search results had doubled !!! A whole four google results !!! In the space of barely an hour a 100% increase !!! Tonight, I'm getting 16 results (wait, make that 17) and, hah, I published before most of 'em. Too bad this is such a backwater, none of my entries are google ranked. Oh well.

Update !!! FLORES hobbit !!!

Er, linguistic update. Flores Hobbit. Was live blogging by ear. Not apparently related to Florence Hobbits (although is a hobbit trail there too).

Read more !!! (sorry to repeat links, only four google news results).

Homo Florensiensis

Florensien hobbit skull !!!

(Not remains of first show trial).

Jakartan hobbit !!!

Emigre Exclusive !!! Live Blogging !!! Radio reports it, Emigre blogs it !!! (abc radio hasn't posted story yet !!!).

Bones of twelve thousand year old one meter tall hominid discovered on volcanic island of Florence. Lived among other dwarf inhabitants and giant Komodo Dragons !!!

Hypothesis one; Using advanced stone tools the miniature hominid possessed skills sufficient to have "dwarfed" elsewhere and built small ocean going vessels to travel south pacific, arriving and settling on the Island of Florence in Jakarta.

Hypothesis two; Dwarfed on the island and was wiped out in volcanic eruption approx 12 thousand years ago. Descendents may be Homo erectus who lived on the island one million to 200 thousand years ago.

Brain size of grapefruit !!!

Twelve thousand year old Hobbit with brain size of grape-fruit !!! Neurological wiring and skills sufficient to build small boat for travelling to isle of Florence !!! Just one metre tall !!! New Species of human !!! Homo Florensiensis !!! More soon !!! (have to check coffee pot).

Australians discover hobbit in Indonesia !!!

Almost Live Blogging! More Soon! (breakfast and coffee taking precedence).

Harmless, mostly.

If you stumble across this site please do not be offended. This is my quiet little hidey hole where I don't have to be diplomatic all the time. I am actually harmless, mostly.

More ironies

Well well well, a bunch of Americans outraged that some foreigner might be meddlin' in your country's fortune. Nevermind that America feels free to trumpet its free way into other countries with bombs and bullets. Never mind that American politicians assume a personal liberty in telling other countries how to shape their politics. Let's try a little experiment shall we, lets type a relatively neutral phrase into google "america australia interfere politics". There, no sway or slant as to who may be interfering with who, just four simple unbiased words. Oh my goodness, what do we have here, google ranked one on that search;

BOTH KERRY AND BUSH INTERFERE IN AUSTRALIAN POLITICS

Both Kerry and Bush interfering in my dry little plot of sunburnt tussock out here on the underbelly of the globe. And a Blog headline no less. Yay for blogs. Well, ok, purely for the sake of balance, a non-blog link; Dear Mr Bush. Please mind your own goddamned business.

Perhaps now you understand what it is like.

(Oh yes, same result when searching "america interfere politics". Noteworthy is it not, that google has a predisposition to throwing up such results. One had to be far more specific "interfere america guardian letter" to find an instance in which America was not the protagonist).

Axis

A gentle reminder. The earths axis. An ethereal spindle. A turning point.

Contrary to that other spin, so recently contrived, the earth's axis is entirely apolitical. The earths axis is in basic terms defined by an imaginary line drawn between two poles around which the earth revolves. It does apparently have a slight wobble. But not nearly the wobble it would have if it were drawn between several points scattered across the surface of the earth, as opined by a certain president in a certain relatively recent declaration of war.

The two poles at each end of our spindle, otherwise known as points a and b through which a line might be drawn in tracing the ephemeral but very real existence of our spindle axis, are entirely devoid of people. Oh yes, there are a few sparse populations in the general vicinity of points a and b, and the occasional traveler, adventurer, commercial prospector or ecologist but these are fleeting and perishable visitors. If one were to place two pins, marking exactly the north and south points of the earths axis, one would not find a single person apart from oneself (oneself being there only momentarily in placing the pins). If one were then to imagine oneself traversing the line between those two pins, through the crust of the earth, through the mantle, through to the core and out again, one would not find a single living human throughout ones entire imaginary journey, except perhaps by some extraordinarily rare chance near the surface (relatively speaking) a mine operator.

An axis, completely devoid of people and of politics. Austerely, beautifully, apolitical.

Security update

Google's desktop search was launched last week and can potentially yield past documents, emails and websites visited on the same computer, which has serious implications for office workers who share computers.

"It's clearly a very powerful tool for locating information on the computer," a US privacy and security expert, Richard Smith, told the Associated Press.

"On the flip side of things, it's a perfect spy program."

Safe guage; feeling extremely safe now. Safe as Kenneth Bigley's brother.

Safe as houses cont'd

Mr Goss's management style

"I think we need to rebuild a true global capability ... with more eyes and ears everywhere," Mr Goss told employees in a private address at the CIA's headquarters in Langley, Virginia, on September 24, the day he took the helm.

Er, yes. Thank you. How very reassuring. I am starting to feel quiet safe now, safe as, erm, livestock.

Safe as houses cont'd

Why do I care there is a balance of power in the senate, and a balance preferably balanced by independents or parties other then the co-alition and Labour? Perhaps it's because it helps stem laws such as these being pushed through within one week of elections.

Mr Ruddock will fast-track three security bills, delayed in the last parliament, that give increased surveillance powers to investigators and create new secrecy provisions for terrorist-related court hearings.

He is also prepared to reintroduce controversial powers blocked by the Senate that include powers to detain and strip-search children as young as 12, if they are needed.

Strip search children as young as 12? Oh yes, for national security of course, how silly of me not to notice that strip searching 12 year olds secures national safeness.

And why do I have no faith a Federal Opposition Labour Government will counter these laws? Oh, no reason, except that State Labour Leader Bob Carr seems so intent on implementing a police state in NSW.

The Premier, Bob Carr, yesterday foreshadowed laws to allow police from the NSW Counter Terrorism Command and NSW Crime Commission to apply to the Supreme Court to search a premises without having to notify the occupant for at least six months.

Do I feel safe? Oh yes, about as safe as a Burmese minister retiring for "health reasons".

The abolition of the National Intelligence Bureau law came three days after Khin Nyunt was allowed to stand aside "on health grounds".

Thai Prime Minister Thaksin Shinawatra, who had close dealings with the deposed prime minister, would say only: "I hope he will get well soon."

Le Manege Enchante

To Ivor Wood. From one magic roundabout to another.

Sway

In a remarkable turn of events it seems the senate may be saved afterall, by the Greens (thank goodness for the Greens) by (ironically) a One Nation split vote and by John Howards spam technique. Not only is Liberal control of the senate hanging in the balance but so, it seems, is the Liberal-National Co-alition itself. Mr Barnaby Joyce, the National candidate for Queensland, is really not sounding happy with John's solicitous advances;

"John Howard could have lost the once-in-a-lifetime chance to control the upper house by sending out a letter to the National Party base (asking people to vote) for the Liberal party ticket," he said.

Vote counting as of 23 Oct;

The National Party's calculations of the expected flow of preference votes suggest it maintains a razor-thin margin over One Nation. But if One Nation gets ahead, preference flows should ensure the Greens beat both of them for the sixth Queensland seat. This would probably leave the Coalition with 38 Senate seats, one short of a majority. - smh.

Oh, and looks like the whole Howard vote borrowing let-them-chip-wood-and-have-it-too tree thing;

"I like trees, I like forests, I believe in an environmentally sensitive nation," Howard told thousands of cheering timber workers in Tasmania. "But I do not think it's fair to throw the jobs of individual Australians ... onto the scrap heap."

was a a bit of a long shot.

Senator Brown says the Greens have also improved their position in Tasmania with their candidate Christine Milne improving her primary vote to 13.3 percent.

SBS are waiting for final results on Tueday.

Google game of fortune

Take one prophet

To an older chief will be born one with dull senses
Degenerate both in knowledge and in weapons
The chief of France feared by his sister
Fields divided, conceded to the soldiers on horses

and one search engine

... He has four younger siblings: Jeb, Neil, Marvin, and Dorothy Bush. ... Bush's loudest critic was French President Jacques Chirac who soon set himself up as the ...

Abdul Rashid Dos-tum ... the Uzbek general who imposed his will on northern Afghanistan from the turret of a tank ... in the approach to the country's presidential election, he had come to politely solicit votes. "I am here because of you," he said ... Then, in a flourish worthy of any western spin-doctor, he leapt on to a horse and galloped away...

Gasp! It is true! Ruin be upon us! Head for the bunkers!

Generate your own Nostradamus Quantrain with the Nostradamus Quatrain Generator.

Also, someone mentioned if a blogger were seeking to make amends with certain exposed parties I should send a few reconciliatory TB's.

Safe as houses

Some countries have all the luck, finding liberation and democracy. What does my country get? A prime minister who wears his moustache above his eyelids and a premier with a penchant for surveillance;

NSW police will be vested with unprecedented "sneak and peek" powers to combat terrorism, including warrants to search properties without telling the occupant they have done so.

Under plans announced yesterday, police will not have to notify the occupant for six months that they had searched the premises. They would also be able to bug terror suspects continuously for up to three months.

Gotcha. "Terror suspects". Mhm. Suitably vague. "Sneak and peek"? Wha?

The covert search warrants would allow police to enter premises, seize property, copy documents, operate electronic equipment and conduct forensic tests. The court could also extend the six-month period in which the occupant need not be notified.

Do I feel any safer? Oh yes, like an East Berliner.

Sham Trial

Firstly, eight years seems hardly long enough.

BAGHDAD (AP) - The highest-ranking U.S. soldier charged in the Abu Ghraib prison case was sentenced Thursday to eight years in prison, the severest punishment so far in the scandal that broke in April with the publication of photos and video showing Americans humiliating and abusing...

Secondly, the prosecuter seems to have missed the point. "Frederick" was doing exactly what he was trained to do.

"He's an adult capable of making decisions," the prosecutor, Maj. Michael Holley, said. "He's an adult and capable of telling, as we learned, the difference between right and wrong. How much training do you need to learn that it's wrong to force a man to...

And most outrageously, the soldier's superiors are still getting away with it. "Highest ranking soldier" my eye, "Frederick" is a wee pawn, the highest ranking is about to run for vice president. Will he be tried?

Frederick admitted that what he did was wrong but told the court Wednesday that when he complained to his superiors, "they told me to do what MI told me to do," referring to military intelligence.

xy 2004

If this log were not here I would lie in bed in the morning listening to the radio after the alarm goes off reflecting miserably upon the ills of the world until the last minute before I have to drag myself to the shower and go where I should be by 9am. How does logging change that? I don't know, it just does. I get up a little earlier. Somehow a few entries each day, nothing special, makes a difference. Not especially meaningful and perhaps a little crude, a bit like initials scratched into the paintwork at a run down rail station, "XY Oct 2004".

We live in an extraordinarily cruel world.

Hundreds of thousands of new recruits face grossly abusive treatment at the hands of senior conscripts throughout their first year of service in the Russian armed forces, Human Rights Watch said in a report released today. - Moscow

He admitted forcing a group of detainees to masturbate while other soldiers watched and took pictures, and described watching a fellow soldier jumping on prisoners' hands and feet. He said he could have stopped the abuse but did no - US/Iraq

She said the school put inmates through an intensive program of mental and physical torture that included beatings, prolonged interrogations, sleep deprivation and continuous exposure to video and audio propaganda.

The "brainwashing", she said, was a more intensive form of "re-education" applied to Falun Gong followers in between stints at places like Chatou and Shanshui, the labour camp in Guangdong province where Tang spent three years until August last year. She said her visit to the Guangzhou City Law School has left her partially crippled in one leg. - China

A man accused of chopping off the fingers of a young Brisbane saxophone player during a home invasion had falsely blamed his alleged victim and two of his friends for stealing from a "drug lord" named China - Brisbane

No, you really don't want to know.

Safety Net

Wow. Australian journalist saved by google

Australian journalist held hostage in Iraq for 24 hours before being released after his captors established his independence by searching for his name on the Internet...Canberra (Reuters)

and by gift of gab

Asked how he coped with the situation, Mr Martinkus said: "I just kept talking."

And I thought blogging just made people annoyed with me.

Head Lines

No wonder so many American's have taken to weblogging, they have all the best news to play with;

Arnie's wife is cold ....

California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger said his sex life suffered after he praised President George W. Bush at the Republican convention...

and Bush is coming.

US President George W. Bush was to court elderly voters at The Villages, a sprawling Florida retirement community...

Tight Spot

Australia had no plans to commit extra troops to Iraq, and the deployment would remain until the job of stabilising the war-torn nation was completed, John Howard said yesterday. - The Australian October 20, 2004

I guess the message from all that banner waving on February 14 2003 finally sunk in. John Howard seems to be playing his cards pokerfaced again, perhaps polling suggests committing extra troops might be unpopular while withdrawing troops might be perceived as too opportune.

I suppose he needs to be careful now that he has a reputation for phone pranks and gatecrashing.

Measure

Oh dear. Unfortunate choice of words. Kofi Annan in a Reuters report few hours ago;

"In these kind of situations you have two wars going on," he told reporters on Tuesday. "You have the war for minds and hearts of the people as well as efforts to try and bring down the violence.

"The two have to go together and it has to be calibrated in such a way ..."

Aie aie aie. Hearts and minds, the spoils of war. Calibrated, as if to prime a firearm.

It didn't sound good coming out of the Whitehouse and it doesn't sound good coming out of the UN either. My mind and my heart, are not trophies.

Rort Report

More irreproachable deception.

Rusty maintains he is massaging the google system for non-blog traffic and claims to have been receiving imaginary emails.

Well, i suppose this is feasible although pitiful. Poor Rusty, so clearly has he given up on his instalanche that he resorts to weak loophole manipulation. It is interesting how all those Rusty blogs, even the ones with only two posts in two months, have such strikingly similar TTLB traffic stats.

47) mypetjawa 9108 visits/day (3080)
48) Kitty Kelley's 'The Family' 9108 visits/day (12277)
49) Anastasia Nasinovskaya 9108 visits/day (12567)
50) Kitty Kelley Sucks 9108 visits/day (12569)
51) Kenneth Bigley Memorial 9108 visits/day (12589)
52) Jack Hensley Memorial 9108 visits/day (12590)
53) Mount Saint Helens Volcano 9108 visits/day (12609)
54) Mount Saint Helens Volcano Blog 9108 visits/day

72) Kitty Kelley's Blog 7211 visits/day (12410)
73) Murdered Hostages 7211 visits/day (12428)
74) Victims of Islam 7211 visits/day (12429)
75) nicejawa 7211 visits/day (12430)
76) Hot Iraqi Blonde 7211 visits/day (9825)
77) Allah Aint In The House 7211 visits/day (7311)
78) Islamic Victims 7211 visits/day (9028)
79) This is Sharia Law 7211 visits/day (12528)
80) Sharia is Fun 7211 visits/day (10940)
81) Ms. Kitty Kelley 7211 visits/day (12531)
82) Did Bush Do Coke? 7211 visits/day (12539)
83) Kitty Kelley Blog 7211 visits/day (12543)
84) MPJ2 7211 visits/day (12545)
85) Bush Did Coke 7211 visits/day (12552)
86) Cocaine at Camp David? 7211 visits/day (12554

Are your pants on fire yet Rust?

To Do List

When you start finding notes to yourself like this;

Delete Trolls
Clean Bathroom
Hand wash woollens
Hot Instant lunch
Read ~ A Basic Course in Iraqi Arabic
Hair Dye ~ Blonde

and this;

1. Do NOT leave pot on stove while blogging.
2. Do NOT leave pot on stove while blogging.
3. Do NOT leave pot on stove while blogging.
3. Try not to leave coffee pot on stove while blogging either.
4. Remember to add steelo's to shopping list.

you know you need to get out more.

Rort Report

Australia has Liberals for Forests, TTLB has Rusty Shackleford and Afghanistan has, what does Afghanistan have?

The Economic Times and New Kerala are reporting a Karzai election lead of 66.9 to 67.3% while Ahmed Souaiaia answers questions.

Account~ability

Webloggers, if not the first to pick up on a doozy story are certainly the first to brag about it. Followed closely by an uneasy journalist or two. "Holding traditional media to account!" the weblogger brazenly proclaims. Sharp witted and razor tongued! Slicing a swathe through traditional news providers! Making An Impact! Impact? Perhaps. I can't tell you how off-putting it is reading a journalist trying to blog on the front page of a daily paper's business section. It just doesn't work. Quite frankly most online ranting is substandard stchk not worth emulating online let alone off. Please paid paper journos, do not lower your profession's reputation by adopting the web loggers biased self-interested tirade.

All this begs the question; if the weblogger is supposed to be holding print and broadcast media to account, then who holds the weblogger to account? The weblogger. Note use of singular.

Some may argue (and argue tirelessly as is the average weblogger's want) that web loggers hold themselves to account. Perpetually launching attacks upon one another, perpetually revolting, as it were, at the slightest provocation. Perpetually linking and bantering, trackbacking and backslapping. At one moment disdainful at another reflective. That the blogosphere by defining itself at various angles "left leaning" "right leaning" and rare degrees of "neutrality" holds itself taut, prevents itself from lapsing into apathy and languid blogrolling. Some might argue all this, but perhaps they might be fooling themselves. Who really, would blow the whistle on a fellow 'logger? Who really, would blow the whistle on a minnow when the whistle could be blown on whale?

Hmm. Who would do that. Who would expose a newt? Defined by creativity, resourcefulness, by inexhaustible political analysis, by independence and individuality - the weblogger. Or so the weblogger would have you believe. Motivated by linkage and stacked sitemeters, by a shot in the spotlight, by 15 fleeting minutes basking in the dim glow of his/her solitary monitor. Who could blame a sprat for craving it so. The weblogger. A middleaged public servant. A poorly paid deviant with time on his hands and a keyboard within arm's reach. Scratching and pinging himself, gurgling merrily over his own twisted genius. Slapping his own back (for who else will?) linking his own posts (for who else will?) trolling his own blog (for who else is there that matters?).

http://www.mypetjawa.blogspot.com/
http://kittykelleysthefamily.blogspot.com/
http://mypetjawa.mu.nu/
http://kittykelley.blogspot.com/
http://murderdhostages.blogspot.com/
http://victimsofislam.blogspot.com/
http://nicejawa.blogspot.com/
http://iraqiblonde.blogspot.com/
http://allahpundit.blogspot.com/
http://islamicvictims.blogspot.com/
http://sharialaw.blogspot.com/
http://shariaisfun.blogspot.com/
http://mskittykelley.blogspot.com/
http://didbushdocoke.blogspot.com/
http://kittykelly2.blogspot.com/
http://mpj2.blogspot.com/
http://bushdidcoke.blogspot.com/
http://cocainecampdavid.blogspot.com/
http://anastasianasinovskaya.blogspot.com/
http://noamchomskyjerk.blogspot.com/
http://kittykelleysucks.blogspot.com/
http://kennethbigleymemorial.blogspot.com/
http://jackhensleymemorial.blogspot.com/
http://mtsthelensvolcano.blogspot.com/
http://mountsthelens.blogspot.com/

All (25) of these blogs belong to Rusty Shackleford, who has been rorting openly and without discipline the TTLB eco-system for two months too long. Crossposting, cross linking and crossdressing. Aided and abetted. But will he be brought to trial? No. He will not. Because, as specified in the weblogger's code of conduct one must "never diss a guestblogger". Besides, exposing him involves linking him. Which would mean he'd get that 15 mins in the sun. Damn it.

How best to discipline this miscreant? Let the punishment fit the crime. Here are 25 of Rusty's trackback URL's. You know what to do (if you don't go here and here). Ping him now, relentlessly.

http://blog.mu.nu/cgi/mt-tb.cgi/50226
http://blog.mu.nu/cgi/mt-tb.cgi/50130
http://blog.mu.nu/cgi/mt-tb.cgi/50211
http://blog.mu.nu/cgi/mt-tb.cgi/50194
http://blog.mu.nu/cgi/mt-tb.cgi/50187
http://blog.mu.nu/cgi/mt-tb.cgi/50083
http://blog.mu.nu/cgi/mt-tb.cgi/50063
http://blog.mu.nu/cgi/mt-tb.cgi/50058
http://blog.mu.nu/cgi/mt-tb.cgi/49897
http://blog.mu.nu/cgi/mt-tb.cgi/49878

http://blog.mu.nu/cgi/mt-tb.cgi/49874
http://blog.mu.nu/cgi/mt-tb.cgi/49849
http://blog.mu.nu/cgi/mt-tb.cgi/49845
http://blog.mu.nu/cgi/mt-tb.cgi/49838
http://blog.mu.nu/cgi/mt-tb.cgi/49834
http://blog.mu.nu/cgi/mt-tb.cgi/49830
http://blog.mu.nu/cgi/mt-tb.cgi/49810
http://blog.mu.nu/cgi/mt-tb.cgi/49806
http://blog.mu.nu/cgi/mt-tb.cgi/49805
http://blog.mu.nu/cgi/mt-tb.cgi/49804

http://blog.mu.nu/cgi/mt-tb.cgi/49802
http://blog.mu.nu/cgi/mt-tb.cgi/49800
http://blog.mu.nu/cgi/mt-tb.cgi/49708
http://blog.mu.nu/cgi/mt-tb.cgi/49699
http://blog.mu.nu/cgi/mt-tb.cgi/49696

Netfasting for Webloggers

After all these wars and elections bloggers will be needing a good sp'ritual cleansing. A virtual fasting.

A bloggers Ramadhan needs careful thought and timing and should perhaps take place during a moment of seasonal respite. It will need to be squeezed in somewhere between political rituals and various other fastings, feastdays and commercial festivities. Which doesn't leave much room really, but i'm sure we could fit it in sometime mid to late November/early December.

As with Ramadhan original the webloggers Ramadhan will be marked by the rising and setting of the sun and by the waxing and waning of the moon. With a few minor adjustments. Net-fasting will begin with the setting of the sun rather then it's rising. From the time the sun sets till the time it rises all webloggers will abstain from blogging about politics. As webloggers are extra-ordinarily conscientious and will be working at their real life jobs by day, never dreaming of blogging on employers time, this leaves two or three narrow windows of opportunity for political blogging;

1. At sunrise before departing for the business parks.
2. At midday during lunchbreak.

and

3. At days end just prior those dim twilight hours after which all webloggers, globally, one after another as the earth rotates upon its axis, will switch off their pc's, close their laptops, put away their palm pilots and gaze out at the emerging stars, flickering much as an old fashioned modem might, in the dusk.

Of course there is the time zone effect. Webloggers will be able to read the meanderings of another or compose their own but exchanges between different time zones shall be mediated by the sun and moon so that a pause for reflection occurrs between the one blogger waiting for their daytime turn and another awaiting their evening respite. Writing about anything else may be published during evenings as long as it is a-political. This is going to require either a great effort in restraint or a great effort in subversion, as a-political rules out almost any topic bar swapping recipes and singing little tunes to one another.

In the evenings bloggers will be free to listen to soulful music, write poetry, cuddle loved ones and get a good nights sleep.

Game up?

There's an old kids game, called "sardines". Maybe you played it once? (I am talking days before pacman, um, and before light sabres). It is a kind of reverse hide n' seek. One person hides and everbody else looks for them (unlike your conventional hide n' seek which begins with everbody hiding and one person seeking). When you find the person you quietly squeeze yourself into their hiding place and hide too, until everyone is squeezed up like a tinfull of sardines and one poor seeker is left running around without a clue where everyone has got too. Finally someone gives the game up by giggling too loud.

Just reminds me of the blogosphere, a little bit.

Election Aus Update

JH's primary vote has slithered it's way up to 41%. On a TTLB scale where 1 = Insignifigant Microbe and 14 = Higher Beings, Mortal Humans and Playful Primates that would place him on a rating of about 6 (slimy mollusc).

83.1% votes counted. With only 16.9% to go he may make it to Crawly Amphibian, but i doubt it.

Is it legal?

"Unauthorised websites". Arrested Iranian webloggers. Incumbent prime ministers winning elections with only 41% of the primary vote. Censorship. Wars and Stereotypes. It is only a matter of time now, before all Winston Web Smith's are held to account.

Ironies

Irony 1 ~ "The election was won on Local Issues"

This was a Federal election. Australia voted for a Federal government not a Local or even State government (although Canberra will be next week on Oct 16). Almost every State government in Australia is actually a Labour government and yet the Federal election result produced the Liberal/National Co-alition. Special irony; "Australians are comfortable with their health, transport and education systems under the Co-alition Federal Government". Local governments have dealt increasingly with local issues while at the same time coping with decreasing funding (allocated by the Federal government) while the Federal Co-alition leader jaunts around the globe doing "important global stuff" like attending Texan bbq's.

Irony 2 ~ The second line Australia's print media have been banging away on. "The election was won on Interest Rates"

A few rowdy Australian paper journalists have managed to convince themselves that on October 11 "Australians looked over the breakfast table at each other and thought of their mortgages" (or something like that, followed by launch into vehement utter crap in the Sydney Morning Herald). The Liberal/National Co-alition ran/jogged their election campaign by "keeping interest rates low". Why (aside from the fact that the reserve bank sets interest rates not JH) is this ironic? Because the areas in Australia hardest hit by high mortgage payments are the cities where property prices have soared to heights on a par with a certain stock market era prior it's collapse and yet the cities (scroll down and study emigre's visual log aids) voted overwhelmingly for Labour (and the Greens). Canberra notably voted Labour. A substantial 9.75% (3.5% swing) of the Canberran vote went Green. In the ACT (the tiny political island/state surrounding Canberra) an astounding 16.25% of the primary vote went to the Greens with a knockout 9.03% swing. Swings of this magnitude are extremely rare in our times unless accompanied by military coup and the Greens did it all with neither fanfare nor armoury and on a limited budget. If these guys can achieve 16.25% on the smell of an oily rag think what they could do with the budget the Co-alition and Labour squandered on election campaigning (special irony - Canberra is Australia's capital, where parliament sits. Where the Co-alition government resides).

So. Why did Australians vote for John Howard? Because they believed the hype. 40.8%* of Australians believed a prime minister that took them to war would protect them from war. Ironic isn't it. And evidently too hard for paper journalists to come out with but it is not too hard for an honest John weblogger. Oh no. It is high time to face facts! And emigre will bring you more. Facts that is.

Back later, have to go and survive in real world now.

* Yes, in Australia John Howard got to be prime minister with only 40.8% of the vote for his party. Ironic.

Plan! cont'd

Thought that was the end? Ha! There is more (cackling hysterically with glee). The majority of current Labour seats have swings of 1.9 to 2.9 % in their favour (except Hindmarsh which won off Liberal with a 1.2% swing). So urban areas, particularly those with a higher Labour swing, can spare 1.83% of Labour voters and still nose past the Liberal vote. Sum;

1.9 to 2.9% - 1.83% = .07 to 1.07 %

Clarified. Because only 1.83% of urban dwelling Labour voters need to move this maintains a .07 to 1.07% Labour swing in the areas they have moved from. Two terms! Six years! Whole Australian political map will be red! Prepare to move peacelovers! (Will work out how to convert red to green later).

Hindmarsh Update; Err, got ahead of myself. Hindmarsh count incomplete. As of right now 84.8% Hindmarsh votes have been counted, the seat is currently held by Lib's, Lab has a .9% swing and the abc are predicting the Libs will keep it.

Plan! cont'd

See previous plan post and maps. Now for the whopping great saved up secret fact. Even though a 2.6% swing in Australian rural areas is required to produce a Labour government, only 1.83% of urban-Labour-voting Australians need to move to rural areas to swing it! Sum;

8,364,262 / 2.6% = 217,471
(mostly rural population divided by 2.6% = required number of Labour votes)

11,829,500 / 2.6% = 307,567
(mostly urban population divided by 2.6% = 76,235 more votes then required!)

217,471 / 11,829,500 = 1.83%
(number of rural Labour votes required divided by mostly urban pop = only 1.83% of mostly urban pop !!!)

Clarification ~ the number of Labour voters required to effect a 2.6% swing in Labour's favour is 184,014 which works out to 1.83% of Australia's mostly urban population. Only a 1.83% swing is required to sweep the opposition government into office with an astounding landslide dash to parliament!

It gets better. Probably even less then 1.83% of urban dwelling Labour voters need move, because they only need to move to key marginal/swing seats (which have a lower combined population then the "Rest of Australia" total) thus requiring a lesser Labour voting population boost.

one min, have to go pluck eyebrows...... ok. back.

Alright, it's a little bit more involved as swings vary slightly from seat to seat and the Northern Territories are a largely rural area but you get the picture. Send queries re relocation quota's to; emigreimagine@relocation dot etc and she will let you know where to go, if she's not busy imagining up something else.

Map 3

Voila! Maps 1 and 2 superimposed to illustrate massive urban swing towards opposition government! Orange dot population areas align with red Labour areas!

Map 2

Where Australian voters mostly live (orange dot areas).

go to Map 3

Map 1

Swinging the Labour vote ~ more illustrative props.

Australia Political 2004

go to Map 2

Plan!

Back! With a plan! Have studied the poll results and prepared the visuals. See maps.

To the jaded eye map 1 appears to indicate a massive blue (Liberal/Republican friendly) tide engulfing the continent. (Teensy tiny red areas are opposition government seats). Now, look at map 2 - orange dots are the major population centres. Here comes the clever bit, voila! Map 3, superimposed 2004 electorate results over map 2! A brief diversion;

Australias total national population; 20,193,762
Population of Sydney; 4,250,100
of Melbourne; 3,610,800
of Brisbane; 1,547,700
of Canberra; 327,700
of Hobart; 189,4000
of Northern Territories; 199,200
Total of Syd, Melb, Bris, Can, Hob and NT; 11,829,500
Total of rest of Australia; 8,364,262

Astute readers will be noticing at about this point that all the blue areas in map 1 are demographically "thin" while red areas are (mostly) demographically "condensed". Sharp-eyed viewers will notice red areas aligning with population centres (an apology to shortsighted viewers, jpeg quality isn't very good for the vision impaired). More telling, that weeny little red patch right between Sydney and Melbourne (smallest orange dot, map 2, lower right) is Canberra. The capital city. Where parliament sits. With a swing to opposition candidates of .68 and .47 percents. Hold it! Stop composing your indignant comment right now. I am not asserting the vote was rorted. Australia's trusty government would never stack rural polling booths. Besides, possums don't have voting rights. No, my plan is a far more wiley plan.

The Plan

Key word; distribution. Plenty of people in all Australia's population centres to go around, yes? Besides, the cities are getting overcrowded. So, here is the plan. LOL no Australians reading. Nevermind, requesting all readers pretend to be Australian for two sec's. Er, more specifically Australian city dwelling labour voters for two secs. Now, five percent of you go and move to WA (left blue chunk), five percent of you move to SA (lower blue chunk) and a couple percent of you move to country Queensland (orange/fawn chunk). That should do it. Canberra dwellers can stay where you are, you seem kind of settled in there and it is a well planned city. Right. Now, elections roll around every three years in Australia. Analysts are pegging two more terms before the opposition government makes a comeback so that's six years to buy or sell, re-settle and register in a new electorate of your choice which you can help to swing the vote in.

Have to go and do some serious surviving now, back later with more incentives to go rural.


Update; Anyone following Aus election results will know Labour only needs a 4 to 5 percent swing (plus a coalition arrangement with the Greens) to be elected. There are still a whole 19.5 percent votes to be counted. Looking good for a table-turning landslide postal vote! Alright, I was being sarcastic. Not that it shows when I am playing out of the overly optimistic pack.

Results!

Finally. Stats! Had to buy a newspaper for the best ones though, the web has been crap the last few days. Slow as, if I were a conspiracy theorist I would be certain there was a-foot a wicked plot to thwart me in reaching the masses (which I never claimed to be leaning toward).

The Greens have 7 percent of the vote. Massive! Seven of every 100 Australians voted Green. Fantastic (considering most of Australia is not very green at all but actually kind of a buff ochre colour). Yay. Wahay. 7 percent! By my calculations, with a total national population of 20,192,875 that means 1,413,501.25 people voted Green. Maiella! Think of of the peace rallies Australia could hold with 1,413,501.25.

Got to go. Settling down to a serious plan (which probably involves my real job and not losing it). Back Later.

Because

Because sometimes you just have to log.