Monday, November 08, 2004

Policy

Ok. Right. Well. If I'm gonna get political I might as well get some policies of my own. I mean, tis all very well banging away on me letter buttons here crapping on about those incompetent boys up in parliament house but there comes a time, sometime after one has thrown up ones arms in dismay, when one tosses the whole towel in the ring. I mean, there are no policies out there that really do it for me. So it's high time I got some policies of me own. I've never really had policies before. In fact I'm one of those swinging voters actually, who doesn't even really have a political party let alone a policy. But anyway. Does it matter. Let's just get on with it shall we.

Policies

1. Population Policy. Contraception and the right to choose is all cool and everything but Peacelovers !!! Wake up !!! You are turning yourselves into a dead end sterile extinct demographic !!! And meanwhile all the straights are going at it like the clappers, producing little rightwing voters. You gotta have kids. And you gotta have at least three each. Maybe four. One spare, for backup. Besides, they're kinda cute those little extra backup ones. And also, there's some peacelovers who's better designed to be great alternative aunts/uncles if you get my drift. You lovin' couples are gonna have t' factor in a couple extra for them. Remember, an anklebiter today is a green voter tomor- in 18 years time.

2. Rural Policy. War is all crap and everything but seeing as our leaders seem hell bent on it we're just gonna have to come up with some kinda reality plan to deal with it. Here is the plan. Move to the countryside. Naw, not the burbs. I mean real open country. Cities are crap during war. You know what i mean, that kinda sitting duck feeling. Besides, if you gonna start creating a tribe you gotta have lotsa good clean country livin' fresh air for 'em. Look. It's fine really. You can set up some cafes and stuff and still get your cap's and macchiato's. It'll be groovy. You'll love it, I promise. And no the farmers won't mind, much, you'll be bringing extra $ into the rural economy so that's all cool too. You could probably even afford a house out there. Cool hey.

Right. Well two is enough policies. Don't wanna get carried away or anything. Have to go shower. Back later.

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