Tuesday, February 15, 2005

Cultural Exchange

An Open Letter to the Australian People - from Raed

Goodness! Mail! And addressed to me! *sigh* too bad I don't have a nationality, it must be meant for some other people who live 'round here. Oh well, let's pretend shall we...

Dear Mr Raed

Well, thanks for saying all those nice things about us but actually, I kind of was hoping you might be able to put some sort of word in for us over there. You see, we have these dreadful camps. AND we (pre-emptively Australian) are starting to get outsourced too. So, while I would dearly love to exert some pressure on my government I can't but help wonder that the pressure has really been exerted on me. You know, it kind of is hard to wriggle about over here with ASIO so kindly recording all our conversations for us. It really is a good thing you know, historically. Such a wealth of data. We will be able to look back on this in future years, like a scrapbook I guess, and listen to all our tapped conversations. Oh where was I. Goodness how my mind does wander. I guess I must not be getting enough nutrition these days. Must remember to stop chewing on the keyboard cable and re-stock the fridge.

Well anyway. There are a few Australians I guess who go out and lobby and stuff but the rest of us - well we just all kind of got a bit freaked out when all the guards started turning up at our train stations and those helicopters started buzzing our peaceful rallies - wheow. I can tell you. Most of us just ducked down our heads and escaped into our blogs instead (the ones of us that are citizens that is). Well at least I think a few of us did, I can't really vouch for anyone else on that one, being an independent entity and everything.

So anyway. Our government knows we all think war is trash and everything but at the moment it's trying to dig itself out of a detention center fiasco that implies Australian ordained brutality ON top of the whole Habib Hicks thing AND that Jack guy who was roughed up in Pakistan with our governments full awareness but conveniently tightly closed eyes and phone off hook approach to international relations. Oh yes and the China thing and the North Korea thing, Howard's busy sidling up to the next nearest super-power as we speak. He is such a jellyfish, just blobs right along with whatever tide is going to keep him in plankton. You know how jellyfish are, no backbone.

Anyway. Enough said. When you figure out how to make that democracy thing work could you please drop us another line because we need a new one too.


As ever, Emigre.

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